Chem Lab 101
Why do people fall in love and then fall out of it? I am a big fan of the chemical theory. No, not getting drunk and hooking up kind of chemicals, I mean the actual release of endorphins and such that creates this blissful feeling. We all want it. That's why people drink and use drugs or work out too much- it makes you feel good. The release of dopamine and seratonin allegedly have a lot to do with it. There was some study in Italy that found that people who have recently "fallen in love" have a drop in seratonin, creating a kind of obsessed depression causing anxiety, jealousy and the need to have sex. Mix that with the release of endorphins and dopamine and you're on an emotional roller coaster. A year later, said patients fell "out of love" and their seratonin levels went back to normal.
Well, what the f@#k does that mean? Basically if you follow this theory, and don't think for one second "Chemical Theory" would not be the name of my band were I to play an instrument, you're in for it.
Then there's the spiritual side of love. I have found myself in strange situations that could only be described as being guided by a higher power. Odd coincidences, chance meetings, weird and exhilarating moments that feel "movie-esque". You hear about all these crazy love stories on Oprah and are inclined to believe that there is one person out there for you. Oh, crap. Add the fact that I am an emotional female and I have no chance.
So, what to do with all of this information? I see people hooking up and breaking up all the time, so why even bother to have a relationship or gasp, get married? I have learned this: The why of it doesn't matter. It's what you choose to do with the situation in front of you and how it makes you feel.
Let's look at Bonnie. She and Greg are working things out. They are truly friends as well as partners/lovers/make me want to vomit because they are so right for each other. They both want the same thing, and work towards goals. And I hear the sex is great.
And then there's Jean. She broke up with Nathan because in the end, he wanted to take care of her. But it involved her quitting her job, moving to St. John's and sitting around all day eating grapes and bossing around a cabana boy. Okay, perfect situation for someone like me, but that's not what she wants. I respect that. I guess. No, I do. Also, between you and me and everyone else reading this, I don't think she was really ever in love with him.
Sophie is in love. So much so that she may move in with Andy Samberg. Bletch, she's just star struck. Someone wise once said, "Talent is an aphrodisiac". That's very true; how do you think Harrison Ford has had a hold on me all these years? He's not really that cute. Well, no, he is.
So, what about me? I took Andrew back. He makes me feel good. And I already know my seratonin levels are low, so that explains that. But if I had one more wish I could put in Bonnie's fruity "Wish Jar" it would be that somewhere, someone would find a way to inhibit the chemical that makes you feel like crap when someone falls out of love with you. If that were marketed, we would have no more need for Alanis Morisette and Fiona Apple songs. But until then, at least I have my friends to keep me sane. That's the only kind of love I don't need to theorize about.
Oh, my dog ate my vibrator.
Well, what the f@#k does that mean? Basically if you follow this theory, and don't think for one second "Chemical Theory" would not be the name of my band were I to play an instrument, you're in for it.
Then there's the spiritual side of love. I have found myself in strange situations that could only be described as being guided by a higher power. Odd coincidences, chance meetings, weird and exhilarating moments that feel "movie-esque". You hear about all these crazy love stories on Oprah and are inclined to believe that there is one person out there for you. Oh, crap. Add the fact that I am an emotional female and I have no chance.
So, what to do with all of this information? I see people hooking up and breaking up all the time, so why even bother to have a relationship or gasp, get married? I have learned this: The why of it doesn't matter. It's what you choose to do with the situation in front of you and how it makes you feel.
Let's look at Bonnie. She and Greg are working things out. They are truly friends as well as partners/lovers/make me want to vomit because they are so right for each other. They both want the same thing, and work towards goals. And I hear the sex is great.
And then there's Jean. She broke up with Nathan because in the end, he wanted to take care of her. But it involved her quitting her job, moving to St. John's and sitting around all day eating grapes and bossing around a cabana boy. Okay, perfect situation for someone like me, but that's not what she wants. I respect that. I guess. No, I do. Also, between you and me and everyone else reading this, I don't think she was really ever in love with him.
Sophie is in love. So much so that she may move in with Andy Samberg. Bletch, she's just star struck. Someone wise once said, "Talent is an aphrodisiac". That's very true; how do you think Harrison Ford has had a hold on me all these years? He's not really that cute. Well, no, he is.
So, what about me? I took Andrew back. He makes me feel good. And I already know my seratonin levels are low, so that explains that. But if I had one more wish I could put in Bonnie's fruity "Wish Jar" it would be that somewhere, someone would find a way to inhibit the chemical that makes you feel like crap when someone falls out of love with you. If that were marketed, we would have no more need for Alanis Morisette and Fiona Apple songs. But until then, at least I have my friends to keep me sane. That's the only kind of love I don't need to theorize about.
Oh, my dog ate my vibrator.
posted by Tempy at 11:00 AM
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